Soon I will turn 30 and as most Indian parents tell their children at this age, mine also started to give me daily advice on how good it is to be married and all the benefits. I did not wanted to go for arranged marriage but since I do not have a girl friend and neither I hope to have one in future so the only option left was arranged marriage.
Parents of both brides and grooms have really high expectations here and I knew this so I kept my parents away from even talking to anyone about marriage before I get a job. However things were more serious which I didn’t knew and I found I was still not eligible for any decent marriage proposals.
After I got job, talks about marriage started again and I was forced to create profile on matrimonial websites. Now I must suggest everyone looking for marriage proposals to create your profile on these matrimonial sites because these sites will give you a reality check. Your parents, friends and well wishers they all like you and talk good things in front of you which raises your own expectations towards your life partner but these matrimonial websites will tell you exactly where you stand. In short after continuous rejections I simply deleted my profile from matrimonial websites and concluded that I still need to go a long way before I can get a decent marriage proposal.
So I am telling this after months of experience and spending hours on these matrimonial sites, if you need to get married you have to be either one of these:
1. A millionaire – you can marry anyone except doctors (you can be ugly that’s not a problem)
2. A doctor – you can get a medico bride / groom. Doctors have made their own clan and they strictly ask for medico match ONLY. (again you can be ugly that’s not a problem)
3. Extremely good looking with age no more than 25 and highly successful with Govt. job and fat pay scale.
If you are either one of the three given above then you can get a decent marriage proposal, otherwise just forget it and stay single. Even if you manage to become one of the three, next comes the commitment issues with the people on these matrimonial websites, I mean all they need is just a left swipe on the mobile app to see new option. And with so many options available at their finger they will never stick with one and keep on looking for next best option.
Working as a freelance web developer alone with no one to help, it was okay till now but since few months I was checking on my daily schedule that I had almost no time left for myself. Earlier I used to take out time for my hobby, some exercise, little things that kept me social like visiting friends place at various occasions or just hanging out and having a good time etc. but now all I was doing was eating, sleeping and working. Due to this change in life style I noticed rapid increase in body weight as well, which is not a good sign at all.
I thought of hiring someone to work for me but again this freelance work was so typical that I could not find anyone around me worth hiring. I talked about this issue with my friends and one of them who was also from computer background suggested that I can give her some work to do and she will do it for free just for learning and work experience. I agreed and also committed that if her work was good, I would pay for the work, but she insisted that she does not need money.
It began with little easy and small task which I gave her to check her ability and she did a kind of “just okay” job and I knew I was not going to get any worthwhile help from her in my freelance work. I lied and said that her work was good although I was not satisfied. Later on I gave her some designing work to check her taste of colours and how well she understands the current design trends and she failed badly in it. Her design work was pathetic but again to make her not feel bad I said it was good. Although I said it was good since I didn’t use her design in final project and obviously it got rejected by the client as well, she understood now that she needs some training and I agreed to give her that, but I was still quite hopeless. Just like I thought, even after several months of training, I was not seeing any progress and during these time, just that she doesn’t feel bad I used to say that you are working well and you are learning fast and so on.
Now during festive season I usually have truckloads of work with myself as I also take some print design jobs from my local clients and I was not having a minute of free time. However I continued with the training and all this time I was lying that yes I got time but in reality I had no time at all. At last I have to give up when I learnt that she is still stuck from where we started and there was no development at all. I had to speak the truth one by one, starting that I simply have no more time for training now. Wish I had said this much before and saved so much time and embarrassment.
When we manipulate someone, although it seems to work for the moment but then deep inside us we know that we are not doing good and that makes us feel uncomfortable after sometime. Here is a nice TVC by Kinley which shows exactly the same feeling of regret and how one can fix it by just speaking the truth.
At the day of Eid this year I really appreciated how my SBI bank’s ATM near Muslim area was especially loaded with brand new printed currency. They knew that we will withdraw for giving “eedi” this day and not for eid shopping and it’s a trend to give new untwisted notes this day to children as eedi.
However few days before Eid I was shopping and skipped this ATM due to long queue there and went to other one of the same bank but different branch. This one was little far but I knew there won’t be a long queue there. But on reaching the stop I found out of two ATM machines only one was working. I went for the one which was working and 3 people were standing already for their turn. A man comes and ask the guard for the banks IFSC code. The guard tells him to wait till he gets the code. These codes are usually written inside the notice board of bank in bold and this person surely was new. This person happen to be standing in front of the ATM machine which was not working. Suddenly a bank employee enters the ATM room in a hurry and shouts, “everyone out, one machine is closed and I am going to close the second one too”. These were his words in a very rude fashion. He also gave some lecture to the person waiting for IFSC code that why was he standing in front of a closed machine. I was not offended by all this scene created by this bank employee but I thought what the need of this rude behavior? No one is the queue was abstaining from moving out and certainly no sane person would still stand there to stare at blank ATM machine screen. I feel sorry for the people who lose their temper unnecessarily. Being polite does not cost anything, but earns you respect.
Earlier in olden days when someone fell sick, people didn’t knew the actual disease and medical science at that time was also not advanced enough to treat every disease found in humans. With advancement in medical science, today’s modern healthcare system has the ability to cure almost every disease. This is a reason why we have longer lifespan now even when we are living stressful life, facing pollution everyday and eating unhealthy junk food. Modern healthcare has been a blessing to human being.
It is unfortunate to see some people still believing in quacks and things like amulet etc. There is a very famous person here in my city who gives amulet for every disease and problems and people claim that they get benefit. I doubt if this was true and enquired people whom I knew well and they told me their sad story that even after years of wearing charm and doing various stuff told by that person, their illness did not got cured at all. Add to it, that person selling amulet was suffering from some illness and it came to my knowledge that he went to hospital for the treatment. Now it’s really eye opening that if he really had a cure for everything by just wearing amulet, why doesn’t he himself wear one and get rid of his illness? What really happen and make these type of people famous is the self healing power of our body. Some people find relief even when they do not take any medicine and it’s all by our body mechanism of handling damage caused to our body by illness. These same people if wear amulet, give all the credit to the person who gave them the amulet and forget how their own body worked hard to cure it.
Latest innovations in medical science have given birth to many life saving medicines and cutting edge medical equipments that helps saving life’s everyday. Simple things we might even ignore, like vaccines and tetanus injection which have been a life saver for all of us today.
Its 12 midnight and I am hearing to free Quwali (that actually I don’t want to right now), thanks to people nearby who I don’t know but are some strange people for sure who don’t need to sleep and need really high volume of everything. By law all loud speakers should be shut down after 10PM and this is strictly followed in banquet halls here but right now the sound is coming from some residential area. Its not a problem of today, its like a season which comes when these unknown people start playing Quwali or mushaira or religious speeches or sometimes even movie songs and when they do it, they continue it till 1 AM or 2 AM. I am not interfering in anyone’s life but if these people do want to listen to all this things at night only, why don’t they keep the volume a little lower so that they can listen themselves? I know these people are at least 2 or more KM’s away and they can keep volume high if they like and still not disturb me but don’t know what their problem that they keep it so high. Since years I am not able to sleep when these people start playing at such high volume, and only wish if I could find them, reach the spot and break their speakers. Enough of it, I need to complain about these people but on second thought I will be leaving this place after some weeks and when others don’t have any problem, let these fools enjoy.