Soon I will turn 30 and as most Indian parents tell their children at this age, mine also started to give me daily advice on how good it is to be married and all the benefits. I did not wanted to go for arranged marriage but since I do not have a girl friend and neither I hope to have one in future so the only option left was arranged marriage.
Parents of both brides and grooms have really high expectations here and I knew this so I kept my parents away from even talking to anyone about marriage before I get a job. However things were more serious which I didn’t knew and I found I was still not eligible for any decent marriage proposals.
After I got job, talks about marriage started again and I was forced to create profile on matrimonial websites. Now I must suggest everyone looking for marriage proposals to create your profile on these matrimonial sites because these sites will give you a reality check. Your parents, friends and well wishers they all like you and talk good things in front of you which raises your own expectations towards your life partner but these matrimonial websites will tell you exactly where you stand. In short after continuous rejections I simply deleted my profile from matrimonial websites and concluded that I still need to go a long way before I can get a decent marriage proposal.
So I am telling this after months of experience and spending hours on these matrimonial sites, if you need to get married you have to be either one of these:
1. A millionaire – you can marry anyone except doctors (you can be ugly that’s not a problem)
2. A doctor – you can get a medico bride / groom. Doctors have made their own clan and they strictly ask for medico match ONLY. (again you can be ugly that’s not a problem)
3. Extremely good looking with age no more than 25 and highly successful with Govt. job and fat pay scale.
If you are either one of the three given above then you can get a decent marriage proposal, otherwise just forget it and stay single. Even if you manage to become one of the three, next comes the commitment issues with the people on these matrimonial websites, I mean all they need is just a left swipe on the mobile app to see new option. And with so many options available at their finger they will never stick with one and keep on looking for next best option.
Growing up to this age would be impossible without my first teacher, and my first teacher is not from any school or tuition. In any child’s life, his/her mother always becomes his first teacher. I still remember how I used to ask my Mom so many questions that sometimes she would get irritated but still answer my queries. Most of those questions were stupid and if someone would today ask me those questions, I would run for my life. It was the heart of a mother that she would not mind her child asking stupid questions every day and do mischiefs.
Although my Mom is not graduate, she taught me and prepared me well enough to get admission in the best school of our city. It was her hard work and confidence that not only I got admission, I used to score very well in class because of her continuous guidance. It was her decision to get me admitted to the best school even if it was expensive and I must say it was a good decision of her.
Time passed and now I was in higher class and she could no longer help, those days’ private tuitions were not popular. I was not getting much guidance now and my marks started reflecting the same. She would attend every parent’s teacher meeting and learnt that I was not paying attention in class. Now in those old days, mostly parents would start scolding their child but she was well ahead of time. Instead of scolding me, she took medical advice and got me checked for any kind of deficiency. I remember those tasty fruit flavoured syrups that doctor prescribed.
Due to my Mom’s hard work, I am now a well-qualified person with a job and good health. Everything that I learned in college would be impossible to understand without the basic education that I got from my Mom. But what about my Mom? She is now getting old and needs care, those grey hair which I know she doesn’t like at all but never ask me to buy her a hair colour. She gave her whole life in my upbringing but doesn’t ask or even want me to do something in return that is how my Mom is.
I went to doctor few months back for slight pain that was bugging me a lot. Being an educated person and belonging to a family where most people are doctor, I went to the most reputed medical college and got my ear checked from a good ENT doctor. This doctor checked both ear with his otoscope which makes it really easy for doctor to see what’s the condition inside ear and nose canal. He could not find anything particular but audiometry test reported that my left ear was not 100% perfect in listening all the frequencies. Doctor said that this pain is due to my sinus problem and gave me medicines.
Now as there was no improvement, I went again and this time it was the senior most ENT doctor that checked my ear and still he could not notice anything inside my left ear. He continued the medicines. However I was not satisfied as there was still pain in my ear and now even new problems started like ringing sound that started on its own any time and what not.
One fine day I just happen to visit my friendly roadside mechanic and I saw a man checking my mechanic ear. He was a quack and often people get their ear cleaned from them. I thought why not give this man a try and let him check my ear. I told him to just see the condition of my ear. I did not told him anything about audiometry test and that I am having pain in my ear and my left ear failed the audiometry test. I just told him to check and do nothing. He checks my right ear in just day light without any scope with his naked eyes and says the ear is fine. He although could not resist and cleaned the ear anyway. He checks my left ear and tadaa..! literally springs from his place and calls the mechanic to see what he was seeing. It was something not right and he immediately gave his report that my left ear needs intensive cleaning or else I may have issues later. He didn’t knew that I was already having those issues so I gave him a go to do his work and fix my ear. On which he told his fee of Rs.150. I knew that I have already spent thousands on antibiotics which were not able to fix my ear so this was no big amount. I just told him that I should not get deaf on which both my mechanic and the quack laughed. Quack open his small wooden box, takes out a small bottle with white oil and pour few drops of it in my ear. He then uses his tool and after few seconds of trying, pulls out a huge ball of gunk that was struck on ear drum causing all the problems. Picture of which is on the right. He again open his box, and pours another oil, yellow color this time and finally cleans the ear with cotton and says your ear will be fine now. Its almost 2 weeks now and his words were correct, my ear is fine and right after the day of his ear cleaning, all the pain, ringing sound was gone. Left ear also passed audiometry test now.
I am not promoting this quack and every ENT doctor will advice to stay away from them but this quack was not only able to find the root cause of ear pain in few seconds using just his eyes and also fix the problem while doctors were clueless even when using advanced tools. Its knowledge and experience that matters, books and degree cannot make someone a good doctor that’s for sure.
When things don’t work out as expected, even small failures in day to day life demotivates us to quite an extent. Like yesterday only I tried a new recipe and it didn’t turn out well and it was like a last push to an already bad day. I am foodie and not only like to taste new varieties of dishes, I enjoy experimenting with recipes and keep hunting for something new for the taste buds.
Apart from food, my recently new venture in photography as a hobby has given me some really good and quality time of my life. Every time I decide to shoot something, it gives me an inner sense that something good is happening and I must say it’s because by shooting photos I am totally disconnected from other thoughts and only creative part of brain is working. Last year I decided to go to exhibition with my friend who is a professional photographer and we went there only for shooting photos. I was skeptical about this at first as I knew that in exhibition people might not like us two shooting photos and give weird expressions but I was wrong.
Both of us entered and exhibition with cameras in hand and from right there I felt a moment of joy and that joy was till the end of our exhibition photo session. I knew it was going to be an awesome day and really it was one of the best time I had. Biggest surprise was people being neutral to camera and not overreacting which gave us some really nice shots of people casually enjoying the exhibition as if there is no camera around. Some people and shop owners do enquired us and asked the purpose of the photo shoot and we manipulated them easily, we made stories and lied to everyone and we enjoyed this too! Some of them thought that we were from newspaper or some TV channel and we agreed to that too. We did this because it was hard to explain the real purpose of our photo shoot to general public and we did not wanted to waste any moment and shoot as much as possible.
At the end we were left with hundreds of photos, each worth a look and some of them were exceptionally good. This was the day when photography gave me really a good dose of motivation and positive energy. I enjoyed that day in exhibition as much as I enjoyed it as a kid. I have decided to take out time from busy schedules and once in a while venture into photography not only as a part of hobby but as a self-mediation for peaceful and positive state of mind.
I joined as a part time computer teacher in January and this was my first job I ever did in my life. It has been two months and today I received my first salary, it was a good day. First month I did not receive any salary because of some delay in paperwork so I got a combined salary for both the months. Its still not a big amount as I easy make much more than this in my freelance web development but still this first salary means a lot to me, I would keep this salary slip forever with me.